A Thread that’s Soft and Golden… Ushering my Poppy Out with Love


16266319_1440571375953915_6050852214427080997_n-minJANUARY 21, 2017:

Please keep our wonderful poppy, Lee Neal, in your heart these next few days and connect with him through love. To know him was to love him, and so many of you out there do. Send the spirit part of you out to meet up with the spirit part of him so he will have no fear, knowing he will stay connected to us all no matter what and that our love supports the private journey home that he finally seems to be on now after years of bouncing back and being so fully IN life and service and faith. His life reminds me of “It’s a Wonderful Life” (which he always says he has had), as I wonder what our town and the many lives he touched would be had he not been there. So grateful that Jamie and Joe and all of us got to spend quality time with him in the last few weeks. Even tho sleep was constantly overtaking him, he got out of bed and got dressed every day anyway, even went out to eat with us, walking everywhere he could, cracking jokes, and LOVING sitting in the sun. Always asking ‘How are the kids?’ (meaning the new great-grand babies, but also meaning all of us). He is finally in bed today on morpheme to help with breathing, sleeping peacefully, with a 24-hour hospice nurse. All is well, We are full of trust and gratitude.

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JANUARY 23, 2017:

There’s a thread that’s soft and golden and it wraps itself around you as it shines about warmness and handles you with care.16178644_1442834042394315_3751819894481727752_o-min

And sometimes you may not see it but it’s always there about you with the signatures of many hearts who love you going with you everywhere.

So if you could remember–though you needn’t cuz I’ll tell you again–you are wrapped in constant tender, I love you my dear father and friend.

(Written for me by Diane Daoust Kerner in 1972; I memorized it and kept it close to my heart all these years–just added the word ‘father’ here). My dear poppy and me, taken by my daughter, his beloved granddaughter, Jamie. This was two weeks before, when we could see he was getting much closer to the end (the beginning?). He slipped away yesterday–Sunday, January 22–at the age of 93. xox

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JANUARY 24, 2017:

While this was 3 years ago, in my front yard, our dad always was very active till almost the end. He had lived with congestive heart failure for about the last 10 years, but always golfed and did whatever was needed to help others. Even tho his kidneys were functioning at less than 20% since his last hospitalization in June, he continued to walk lots until a few weeks ago, and refused to be in bed even as sleep overtook him these past few weeks–always up and basking in the sunshine whenever it was out. This is the way I think of him now, lighter than air, flying free. xox

Much Love, XOX
🙂  Hawnie
(My family and friends’ nickname for me…which means it is yours too, if you want, since I consider you my friend).

PS –  While many people said they were sorry for my loss, I want you know I had the experience with both he and my mom of their death seeming ‘just right,’ and even a happy thing..  It has also been helpful for folks to ready what I wrote about my mom, and to thinnk of tears as pure love, not necessarily sadness. Here is the link to that post, too, if you’ d like to understand more how that works