Holding the Parts of You that DON’T Feel Grateful

Sometimes, doing a gratitude list is great. But when you can’t shift the feeling of being a victim of something that is out of your control–and then you add guilt to the mix for feeling that way–remember that is YOU that you just turned against. Would you want to steamroll over a child’s feeling of being hurt or sad or feeling unsafe about something–then shame them for believing there is a problem?

Ever want to strangle the people that say, “Just think of 10 things you are grateful for,” when you simply don’t feel grateful? I’m here to support the part of you that judges you for judging, the part that doesn’t yet know how to “just be,” that part that feels hurt, lost, not enough, or is always doing or worrying or striving or deciding or ruminating or controlling or judging. Love that one, just as much as you love your cheerful, laid back parts!

You may already know, if you’ve been around me long, that I have concerns with “Affirming OVER” the littlest part of us, ignoring the many costs of not attending to the part of us that doesn’t believe the positive thinking. It may first need our help to transform what it’s believing. With a simple compassionate inquiry that uses the conscious mind to expose the errors in its own logic, the terrorizing thoughts fall away of their own accord (the mind can no longer believe its own story, so the story of fear or anger or sadness starts to fall away–along with the emotional chemicals the brain was sending out.)

Gratitude and connection are the high frequency states that naturally emerge (i.e., love) once we have seen through the low-frequency stories that separate us.

So, there is no reason to place those “down” stories outside what I call the sphere of lovableness and silence them with a story of gratitude, because then we are creating MORE separation by minimizing what these parts of us feel are very real concerns. We are all about truly transforming them–setting them completely free of their scary or angry beliefs–instead of steamrolling over them!

Harnessing the Symmetry in the scary future vision that we were believing, and neutralizing it once and for all with its polar opposite, is an almost miraculously powerful tool for healing ourselves, especially when coupled with witnessing the cost to us of having bought into that belief. Then going further and truly imagining who you would be without that doom-and-gloom projection frees your subconscious coupled with the grand “All-That-Is” to create a NEW YOU in ways your conscious mind can’t conceive of.

So on one hand, positive thinking and focusing on what you feel grateful for, rather than what you hate or fear, are really important. And yet, because coupling positive emotions with the happy vision is what really ramps up the shift, it’s important to care about the parts of you that are hurting, don’t feel grateful, or CAN’T yet believe the affirmations or see the vision.

I love that little one (which we will call THE TURKEY in you just for today)–the one that reacts to all the other TURKEYS in everyone else, even when your story says you are supposed to meet everyone with unconditional love and equanimity. But sometimes you don’t–even after this LONG spiritual journey!

Can you be grateful for that inner nay-sayer, harsh critic, ungrateful putz? Can you thank it for shining a light on the parts of you that want and need your help? With our Happiness Hacks and other tools, you can go beyond mindfulness, beyond affirmations, even beyond somatic experiencing to you stop judging and give the putz a chance to re-wire its story through the inquiry-based stress relief of The NO-MATTER-WHAT Way. For now, can you be with it just as it is, care that you’re hurting, and then–when you’re ready–engage in this deep (yet fun & light) inquiry to “see through” the fearful or negative thoughts?

That’s the theme for this weekend, so watch for emails this weekend that let you know about how to access all our digital tools and courses at a Cyber Monday discount (and our LIVE spring retreat as well!).

SO when I say “Have a Fun Thanksgiving,” I mean the no-matter-what happens all-inclusive beingness (which spell-checker turned to “being mess.” Love it!).

Have fun “being a mess,” whatever that looks like, this Thanksgiving, my darlings. Xox

and let the TURKEY in YOU Get Up and DANCE.

(Click here to play the video of me being a crazy turkey!).

Much love,

P.S. If you’d like to learn how to use the Law of Happy Symmetry to reliably create a life you love by loving the life you create, I invite you to visit our shop… and check out multitude of products to choose from on your journey to removing your barriers to unconditional love and gratitude. Keep your eyes open for the 25% OFF CYBER MONDAY SALE